I know what I need to do but I keep dropping things by end of day
Some clients find it helpful to have a simple daily structure that separates what must get done from what they'd like to get done - would something like that be useful to explore?
A mid-level manager who starts every day with a task list of 10-15 items and regularly completes four or five. She is increasingly demoralized, describes herself as 'bad at follow-through,' and doesn't connect the problem to list design. She believes the issue is her discipline.
Frame this as a structural fix, not a motivation fix. 'Before we talk about how to get more done, let's look at how you decide what goes on the list in the first place.' The resistance here is identity: she believes her undone tasks reflect a discipline problem. Don't challenge that directly. 'Let's see what a two-column design reveals.' The Must-Do / Should-Do split forces her to make explicit what was previously implicit - and often reveals she's been treating everything as Must-Do.
Watch the size of the Must-Do column. If it has more than five items, the client is not distinguishing - everything is getting promoted to essential. Watch also whether Should-Do items are genuinely lower priority or are Must-Dos that she's uncomfortable admitting. A Should-Do column with zero items is a red flag: it means she still hasn't separated the categories.
Start by asking her to count the Must-Do items. Don't comment yet. Then: 'What would it mean to end the day having done only those?' If she says that would be a failure, ask: 'What made them Must-Dos?' The productive question is: 'Which item on this list would you tell your boss wasn't done today without apologizing?' That item is the actual Must-Do.
A client who cannot identify any Should-Do items - everything is Must-Do - may be operating from perfectionism or a fear of deprioritizing that warrants direct exploration before adding more structure. Severity: low. Response: continue with the tool but name the pattern explicitly.
A recently promoted team lead, three months into the role. Still completing individual contributor tasks at the same rate as before while also managing four direct reports. She is exhausted, frequently misses lead-level commitments, and says she doesn't know what she's supposed to be doing differently.
Frame this as a role-translation exercise. 'Let's look at what Must-Do means now compared to six months ago.' Expect resistance in the form of, 'everything is important' - which is true from an IC mindset. Name the shift: 'In your previous role, getting things done was the job. In this role, getting the right things done while enabling your team is the job. Those are different Must-Do lists.'
Watch whether team-related tasks appear in Must-Do at all. New managers often put all individual work in Must-Do and all manager work in Should-Do, or nowhere. If her Must-Do column has zero items that touch her team's work or development, that's the coaching conversation. Also watch for completion time: if she finishes the checklist in under three minutes, she's copying her old IC list without translating it.
Start with Must-Do. 'Read me what's here.' Then ask: 'What percentage of these would have been on your list six months ago?' If the answer is more than 70%, the role transition hasn't landed in her daily behavior. The question that opens this is: 'What would a direct report say was missing from your attention this week?' That tends to surface the gap between the list she's running and the list the role requires.
If the client shows distress when asked to move any IC task to Should-Do or off the list entirely, explore whether the role transition has generated identity anxiety that the checklist work alone won't address. Severity: low. Response: continue with structure, but create space for a direct conversation about what the promotion means to her sense of professional identity.
A senior individual contributor, eight years at the company, who works long days and consistently reports to his coach that he's 'slammed.' When asked what he accomplished in the past week, he describes meetings attended and emails answered. He cannot identify a specific deliverable he produced.
Introduce this without framing it as a productivity fix - he will defend his busyness. 'Let's design a simple tool for tracking what you actually complete, separately from what you do.' The two-column structure is useful here because it creates an explicit distinction between actions and outcomes. Frame Must-Do as: things that, if completed, you could point to and say 'I produced that.'
Watch whether Must-Do contains any item that produces a tangible output - a document, a decision, a completed handoff. If all Must-Do items are activities (attend, respond, review), the client is tracking effort rather than contribution. Also watch end-of-day retrospective: clients in this pattern tend to celebrate being busy rather than being productive, and will mark incomplete items as 'in progress' rather than not done.
Start with what did NOT get done. 'Walk me through the Should-Do column at end of day.' Then shift: 'Of everything you checked off today, which ones would someone else notice if they hadn't happened?' The items that no one would notice are activities; the ones that would be missed are contributions. That distinction is the real coaching content.
A client who is genuinely unable to identify a concrete deliverable from any given week may be in a role with unclear expectations, or may be using activity as a shield against performance accountability. Severity: moderate. Response: explore whether the busyness pattern is organizational (unclear role, poor management) or personal (avoidance of high-stakes work).
ADHD adult who forgets purchases or errands until they become urgent
ADHDADHD adult who suspects they're spending more time on screens than they realize but has no data
LifeMy days feel reactive and I want to plan them with more intention
